pain won't stop

, oh, the pain won't stop, almost like it's got a hold on me, shackles and cuffs, i can be no more than a slave, and still the pain won't stop, like my demons got control of me, won't take me alive, i guess someone's gonna see the crime, and it won't be me, and it can't be me, and it won't be me, i won't let it be me, and it won't be me, and it can't be me, and it won't be me, i won't let it be me, i'm staring at the pain in the mirror, or is it a facsimile?, question hurts more than the fact that it resembles me, thought em all in the past, i mean essentially, so when we side by side i just act like it's all a memory, and then i got a whole market of fans, with no clue what i speak of, but some of ya'll understand, if you knew about my woes you wouldn't target the man, and if you did it'd be about more than a marketing plan, i got a heart that's ice cold, i've been trying to melt, it's talent, honest to ya'll, all while lying to myself, seem like i do the most damage, all when trying to help, and no one asked for it, i decided myself, you think the road a nigga traveled, has been long enough for ya'll to see the winner in him?, don't know if i'm fighting my demons or going to dinner with em, i sit across from that table just looking brave and tough, but it's only right they get the check, figured that i paid enough, fans say they waitin on a break up, don't want me at the altar, but how would their lives alter, i figure how could they fault ya?, followed me in this business, you witnessed me go through torture, with my ex's so what if? wish i wouldn't want anymore, begs the question what do niggas really want in me?, couldn't be as simple as misery loving company, can't be as cliche as being a gift and a curse, but how could you ever claim to love someone then wish em the worst?, it appears my happiness has some people resenting me, should i appreciate love that come with contingencies?, ya'll get mad whenever someone else mentions me, ironic, got a ex that's showing similar tendencies, spite stems from hate, i try to never be near it, do you only want the best for joe when we could share it?, that can become obsessive like you wouldn't believe, don't take my word, just look at what happened to steve, it got raqi looking rocky, had em by me and i watched em both deteriorate, was ugly if you trust me then you wouldn't want to share their fate, and so it seems the people i'd jump in the casket for, their mind's playing tricks, i wish they knew they mattered more, would they ask for more or would that will subside?, poured my heart out all these years, i'm shocked i'm still alive, tell him like i toast stack, it gets no realer, you love something too much, guarantee it'll kill ya, for real, i crashed a million times, still i'm without a dent, they come to me to air it out but i'm without a vent, i have nightmares about the shit i thought i said, cried enough that posturepedic is a waterbed, look at you like a nobody, it ain't much i could ask of you, and i'd give you a hand but what the fuck would you attach it to?, finish one chore, god will give throw you some more shit, it's not enough i'm fighting mine still i battle your shit,