shitty golfer

i'm a shitty golfer, you can ask my wife, i've been out there hackin' every day of my life, i got the shorts and all the plaid sweaters, and new taylormade driver didn't make me any better, man, i hit 'em fat and i hit 'em thin, i roll 'em in the bunker's man, i hit 'em again, slice 'em in the bushes, crank 'em in a creek, i popped that sucker up and hooked it out in the street, yeah, i'm 245 right down the middle, and i'll miss the green, to the left just a little, chili dip a wedge, and put it all together, hit that son of a bitch right up there in the leather, if you call that good, and let me press on the side, you can put me down for a five, hey, i'm a shitty golfer, most of us are, but we carry our clubs in the back of our cars, what else you gonna do when you're out of town, and you need to waste a whole day and shoot another round, man, i played augusta, and i played pebble beach, and one time at sawgrass i shot 83, if i live long enough to be 88, i think i'll celebrate it by shooting my age, yeah, i'm 245 right down the middle, and i'll miss the green, to the left just a little, chili dip a wedge, and put it all together, hit that son of a bitch right up there in the leather, if you call that good, and let me press on the side, you can put me down for a five, oh yeah, you can put me down for a five