becoming

a long time ago i never knew myself. then the memory of shame birthed its gift. no more. the small one, the weak one, the frightened one. running from beatings, deflating. i'm becoming more than a man. more than you ever were. driven and burning to rise beyond jesus. i'm born again with snakes eyes, becoming godsize, i found my life was slipping through my hands. perhaps through death my life won't be so bad. i can see you, can fuck you, inside of you. staring through your eyes. belittle your friends to serve me, to suck me, to realize my saving grasp. i of suicide. i the unlord. i'm born again with snakes eyes, becoming godsize