lost cause

i took a lot to get to twenty seven, my knees are weak but i'm still standing, i wasn't meant for making it, but i'm not the type to call it quits, colly but trying to be clean, breaking but still in one piece, hanging on, hanging on, but i feel my grip slipping, we win some but lose most, and close calls keep us close, this life is wearing thin, it's eating at my skin, we can't keep reflecting, just keep on pressing, on and on and on, 'til we finally belong, i can't seem to get past all my problems, i try my best but never solve them, i was never one for making it, and i think it's finally sinking in, colly and not coming clean, breaking and losing each piece, falling down, falling down, no one's reaching out to catch me, what's it gonna take for me to find my way, i can't keep struggling to always finish in last place, am i just wasting all my time, chasing the wrong life, i just wanna be, i just need to be, free from the judgements, and all those against me, free from opinions they've built, on who i should be, can you even hear me, i'm fucking screaming, i just wanna be heard, won't someone save me, bring me to safety, we win some but lose most, and close calls keep us close, this life is wearing thin, it's eating at my skin, we can't keep reflecting, just keep on pressing, on and on and on, 'til we finally belong, and i've given everything, given everything, but i gain nothing, gain nothing, yeah i'm not giving in, not giving in, my knees are weak but i'm still standing, everyone tells me to stay strong, but i've got nothing to hold on, everyone tells me to stay strong, but i've got nothing to hold on, everyone tells me to stay strong, but i've got nothing, lately my head is a mess where anxiety nests, i feel invested in stress like it's all i have left, every failure's a debt and they're up to my neck, i'm fucking drowning in doubt and there's no swimming out, everyone tells me to stay strong, but i've got nothing to hold on, everyone tells me to stay strong, but i've got nothing