oceans

i learnt to let go when i was younger, scared of growing old, i would swim far into the ocean, and try to stay afloat, until my lungs would cough up water, and sand would coat my bones, and i hope, now, that someday i'll open up the floodgates, and let the lyrics flow, someday i'll understand the dry taste, when the words are trapped below, some days i wonder if my airway, is clogged with all the quotes, that i wrote, now, i feel worthless, maybe i should open the drawer, burn the pages, write poems with the ash on the floor, pour the ink, into the sink, and watch it drain from the shore, i don't want love no more, though it's the one thing i've been searching for, though it's the one thing that i miss the most, now i'm afraid to be alone, i learnt to grow old when i was younger, scared of staying young, afraid of the thoughts that i had conjured, that sat atop my tongue, knowing i'd change the worlds opinion, if they would just, listen up, but they won't, now, i feel worthless, maybe i should open the drawer, burn the pages, write poems with the ash on the floor, pour the ink, into the sink, and watch it drain from the shore, i don't want love no more, though it's the one thing i've been searching for, though it's the one thing that i miss the most, now i'm afraid to be alone, to be alone, looking in the mirror like, maybe i will find myself tonight, i ask for a better mind, then tap into the sight through my third eye, i had never realized, i thought i had a chosen my design, i thought i was broken all this time, i don't want love no more, though it's the one thing i've been searching for, though it's the one thing that i miss the most, now i'm afraid to be alone