i can't see the light

for weeks i've felt lost and i can't see the light, shining through the darkest of days, what can i do to stop myself from hiding my thoughts, from this world of lies?, i've felt so lost for far too long, trying to leave it all behind, i find i cannot forgive myself for feeling like this, how can i even begin to forgive myself for all the things i'm thinking of doing to you?, how can i forgive myself for this?, but it's all in your head, you just walk out of my life and you expect me to let you back in, with open arms i'll turn to you, for weeks i've felt lost and i can't see the light, so i'll do this one alone, i'll hide my thoughts from you, is it beyond impossible for me to hold on for you?, is it beyond you to forgive me?, if not i'll do it on my own time, how can i forgive myself?, for my world is slowly falling down, and you just stand there and watch me fall