blood

, i know you ain't doing the greatest, but maybe one day i'll be famous, i'll get you out of that fucking apartment, you been in since christmas, back when i was 16 and reckless, i never told you how much i appreciated, everything you did for me, i was too ashamed to speak, reading through the notes, you wrote about me in fifth grade, you probably never thought i'd see, i know that it was tough, when you and daddy split up, but you made it through, it showed me how strong you could be, i know you said be tough, when me and chelsea broke up, but it's been a year and stuff, and it still bothers me, everything you ever said to me, i listened very carefully, i kept it in my heart, cause you were always there for me, even when you caught me smoking weed at 17, you said "you're better than that", but you weren't even fucking mad at me, i know that you raised me in church, and when i told you i don't have a religion, you said it hurt, it hurt that we didn't know you were in pain, but even though we think differently, i still love you the same, i hope i've been the greatest brother ever, i could never top the levels, of the sister that you've been to me, and i know i barely see 'em, but remember to give and aria a kiss for me, you taught me how to swim when i was five, and you never told on me, when i was dumb enough to drink and drive, i was pretty stupid at 18, and none of the mistakes i made, would ever make you hate me, even that time i screamed and threw a fit, cause you wouldn't get off the phone, i was pissed, i was probably 9 or 11, around that time that daddy told us, brian went to heaven, and then there's our biggest sister, she's moved around a couple times, she knows we all miss her, we don't speak much, barely keep in touch, but just know i'll always love you no matter what, the distance between you and me, could never make me think less of, the pretty woman you became to be, and when you get a chance, when you hear this, say hello to tyler and sidney for me, the first time i saw you cry i was 6, but you're the strongest man i know, that's why your name's on my wrist, you showed me how to work when i was 12, you said if anybody ever gives me shit, then go and give them hell, i know your mama ain't doing the greatest either, i really need to get my ass up and see her, she probably doesn't know she created an idol, only someone like you could deserve the title, i never really told you what you meant to me, i was busy being mad at you for being mad at me, for doing stupid shit like messing with, a girl that had a boyfriend in the military, i was lucky not to get my ass beat, but i probably should've, so it would've knocked some sense into me, you always said that you were proud of me, had a rough patch but had it figured out when i was 23, i'll never take for granted what you've done for me, i'll make my count like you said in 2003, i'll keep pushing on and keep my head up, and one day i'll be just like you, you'll see