sacrifice of life

you dream to waste too long, been counting on those you knew as friends. just to see them turn and plot and fall before you. the sacrifice of life for them you'd make but now you know as lies, just replace yourself with those who feel the same way that you do. when you think that life has done you wrong, pushed you down enough, don't shake your head and say o.k. because if you think my life is yours to wrong-then call me on my bluff, and you'll turn and run away. the pain behind my eyes was recognized from the time you came to me. but cigarettes can cloud my mind for only just so long. to disrespect my intellect through ways and means you can't confuse. it breaks my heart and it tears me up inside. i should have learned not to sacrifice myself. don't fall beneath me. i should have learned not to contradict myself. don't crawl beneath me. but now i've learned to see myself with someone else. you say its o.k. for me to want to, you tell me its alright for me to be sad. is the time now for redemption?