the modern student

will shakespeare thought that fellows creep, "unwillingly to school,", and must to pore o'er knowledge deep, be driven like a mule. the classics were the goals pursued, by boys in willie's day, the english tongue was far too rude, save for the common play. new teachings have sprung up since then, we've buried all that rot, we will no longer wield the pen!, we have the turkey trot. we care not what old tullius raves, and really must confess: he should have sunk beneath the waves, ere catiline's address. the greatest julius when he stood, most mighty o'er the mass, with all his tact he never could, have thrown a forward pass. at homer who told tales of troy, we raise an awful din, we'd rather hear sir eddie foy, sing "ragtime violin.", salome too was not the whirl, the semites used to think, why miss deslys could make that girl, sit down and take a drink. for modes and ways have changed a bit, since shakespeare was a boy, the empty fads have made a hit, and ignorance is joy.