cold crush

kids ain't ready for the style i got, my life's a fucking horror movie with the violent plot, and i can feel my thoughts cracking and bending, no turning back and there's no happy ending, i'm climbing walls with anxiety, walking zombie, i'm not going quietly, ay, i'm the northwest best, in the grey and black north face gore-tex vest, who want slide down my vortex next?, smoke tobacco, shining with stars to a black hole, that's what i get for being such an asshole, want to put a rope around my neck like a lasso, rain's coming, clouds rolling over head, words pouring from my head, be a warrior 'til i'm dead, but i don't want to meet joe black, i'm not ready yet, long black box with roses and poinsettias, yo, yeah, hit the stage with radicalised battle cries, unintentional role model with bad advice, between a rock and a hard place, my favourite movies were goodfellas and scarface, and god father, guess i took that shit too literal, wasted twenty years of my life rolling with criminals, snort coke, get a dirty and perverted mind, it's not a good look doing coke at thirty-nine, put that lame shit to bed, change the chapter, 'cause when my head's clear you'll still feel my rapture, plus there's so much out still to capture, i'm recharged, ready to go, be an adapter, through the storm to the path of illumination, even if you feel like you're half of a wrong creation, my whole life been babbling gloomy statements, but now feel like my brain's unravelling doom and hatred, blow my brains out and drop to the pavement, what if there's more then i'm locked up with satan, burning for eternity does not sound appealing, so now i'm kneeling looking up past the ceiling, ask god's forgiveness and please start me healing, 'cause if you mean it, i swear you could feel it, tears drop leaving stains on this paper, i'm writing on, you can't give up, you just keep fighting on, mad the destroyer or madchild the healer?, don't be afraid, let your love out, reveal it, feeling chained to my list of regrets, so many barely move breaking into a sweat, and everything's dark and grey, i see no colour, break free from my past, need bolt cutters, unless it's family or blood, don't trust others, i'm getting older but still cold crush brother